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These holiday visits are also great times for a subtle well-check; take note of any signs in a senior loved one's household that they may need a little extra help around the house.
Most of us have spent the majority of our lives looking at our parents or grandparents as symbols of independence; they have always been the ones who have helped and assisted us. There does often come a time when a tipping point has been reached and suddenly that same model of independence and support needs our help.
If you are visiting your parents or grandparents this Holiday Season, take a look around to see if any of the following conditions are in evidence.
The Top Ten Signs a Senior Needs Extra Help
- Less Active Lifestyle: More time spent at home, decreased church attendance, less-frequent trips to the park, the movies, etc.
- Decline in Housekeeping Quality: Beds remain unmade, dirty dishes are piled in the sink, dirty laundry has piled up, etc.
- Blackened or Charred Pots and Pans: A sign of forgetfulness and/or significant hearing loss.
- Uncharacteristic Weight Loss: A sign of increased inability to prepare regular, nutritious meals; a sign of decreased self-care ability and interest.
- Bruises, Abrasions or Other Signs of Falls
- Distinct Change in the Home's Exterior Upkeep and Maintenace
- Bills and Other Mail Piled Up and Unopened
- Reduction in the Number of Social Engagements: Ceasing regular card game attendance, bowling league participation, gardening club activities, etc.
- Lack of Interest in Pursuing Hobbies: Sudden cessation of golf or gardening, sewing circles, book clubs, etc.
- Reduced Self-Care Efforts and Concerns: Personal hygiene failings such as dirty clothes, body odor, etc.
The Right Time to Discuss Help Needs
As I mentioned earlier in the post, our senior loved ones are just as apt to see themselves as the indepenent and support provider for you; they may well be unaware of the signs you see during a holiday visit and will often have a difficult time setting aside their pride to constructively discuss their need for help. Nevertheless, the best time to start such a dialog is before any of the signs you've observed result in a serious fall or other household injury or calamity that could require even more extreme corrective measures.
Approach the matter calmly and patiently; handle the matter tactfully and respectfully. These are the people who provided you with years of support and assistance; allow them to maintain the sense of dignity and self-direction they deserve. Handled properly, a mutually agreed-upon plan-of-action can be a win-win for everyone!
Alternative Measures
There are a number of things which can be done around the house to help ease a senior loved one's difficulties with daily activities. Simple additions to the household, such as bathroom grab bars, ramps, better lighting and other modifications and improvements, can go a long way toward improving the quality of life for a senior loved one or couple.
Above all, have a Happy Holiday visit! Enjoy and cherish each other's company!
